Selasa, 20 Januari 2015

Day #20: Which Way You Goin'?

Why, hello all my NEW and *OLD* friends!!
Today I'd like to talk about my reflection on your comments from yesterday and about what brought me to the decision I've made.

When we look back on the last 5, 10, or however many years we have been overweight- we won't be able to pin-point one meal or one holiday season that you gained the 50-100lbs that you are currently overweight by- at least I can't. It wasn't just 1 really bad decision that you made that caused you to become obese, no- it was about 10,000 decisions, at least. It was a progression (most of the time over a long period of months and years) of making decisions that were not healthy that lead to your physical demise.

You see, there have been multiple times in the last few months where I have felt frusterated b/c it seemed as though I was missing some "secret ingredient" that would allow me to lose all of this weight in the short amount of time that I wanted to. I kept thinking, "maybe it's a low carb diet, spin class, becoming a vegetarian, etc." that will do the trick. It felt like surely there had to be a better way to do this than losing an average of 2lbs a week for the rest of the year- like I was yearning for something drastic.

And then I got it: these extra 160lbs or so that I was carrying around were not a result of one bad decision and didn't get put on in the matter of a few months; no- it was a long series of seemingly SMALL and INSIGNIFICANT decisions over a long period of time that got me to where I am. I remember days where I would just lay around all day and eat crap and think, "It's okay that I do this for one day, it's not like I'm going to always do this- it's one day- no big deal." How severly stupid I was being!

I now believe that EVERY decision we make in life is a step in a certain direction- and it is no different in regards to health. We have all set goals that we want to achieve, some long-term and some short-term, they are the "destinations" that we want to reach- well, EVERY DECISION we make is a step either TOWARD that destination or AWAY from it-!

When I chose to have 2 small chocolate covered pretzels yesterday that were brought in by a co-worker, clearly that is not a decision that will cause me to gain back all of the weight I lost, but it is CERTAINLY not a step forward! When I chose to forgo getting cheese on my sandwhich at Subway yesterday that is obviously not a decision that will cause me to lose 5lbs- but it is most definitely a step FORWARD!
We all know that only insane people think that they can continue to make the same decisions over and over again and get a different result than what they have always gotten and I know that I'm getting a little fired up about this but it is because I'm sick of being obese and sick of making stupid mistakes that I constantly convince myself are "not a big deal." Well, "not a big deal" mistakes are what got me in this boat to begin with!

I challenge you today, just as I am challenging myself, to realize that the thousands of decisions you make each day constitue a step either toward your goal or away from it- no matter how small and insignificant they may seem. When you choose to not have that cookie that is calling your name from the kitchen counter, you are taking a step forward. When you chose to not take the walk that you know you should be taking, you are taking a step backward- and add a few of those backward steps up and you'll be right back where you started! Recognizing this will not only help you to not find yourself gaining 10lbs "accidentally," but it will also help you to give yourself credit for each "small" step that you take forward.

Now you all know that I don't advocate never being able to have some of your old favorite foods b/c I know that if I told myself that I could never have any of that ever again I might as well quit now b/c I'm not going to live my life being restricted like that, but I will make sure through portion control and adjusting what else I eat that day that I'm not allowing a craving or lack of planning and self-control to cause me to take even one single step away from my goal!

Needless to say, I will be keeping a food journal. After I read all of your amazing comments and reflected on what some of the possible outcomes could be from the decision I decided that not journaling could be a POTENTIAL step backwards- I'm not saying that I would definitely be- but there is room for that to happen. Whether I want to admit it or not, journaling my food intake will cause me to be more aware of what I am eating and I truly see it as a DEFINITE step in the right direction- which is towards my goal! Today at lunch I'll be heading out to buy a cute and easily portable journal that will become my constant companion :) Like I said, it's not that I think not tracking would be a bad decision, but I want to make the BEST decision. As far as whether I will count calories or pts...I'm going to be experimenting with that a little. For the rest of this week I will be giving counting calories a try and just see how it goes- I'll let you know!

p.s. you guys rock at giving advice :)

Some Random Updates:

- I had every intention on trying out that Jazzercise class last night but I came down with some sort of "bronchitis-ish" deal on Sunday and I'm still trying to kick it- next week though fo sho!

-I took a sneak peek at the scale today and I am up 4lbs from my post-fasting weight, which is no suprise being that my body is storing food since it just came out of starvation mode; however, I am still down 3lbs from my pre-fasting weight. It is my goal that on my weigh in day (Sun) I will be at my post-fasting weight- 326.

And finally, I leave you with a pic of my dinner from last night: It's is a whole weat pita with tomoato sauce, tomoato's, ff cheese, and garlic! Yum! Oh and a yummy salad topped with the best caesar dressing ever (only 50 cals for 2 TBLS from Trader Joe's!)

Peace Out Lovelies!