Wow- it has been a loooonnnnng time since I last posted. Although I miss blogging and reading blogs dearly, I've come to accept that it's just not something that fits regularly into my life right now but I don't want to shut this blog down completely so I plan to try and post at least monthly- I understand by doing this I'm not necessarily providing a sense of support to the blogging/weight loss community like I was in the past, so this blog will basically just exist as a way for me to keep record of what has happened & continues to happen and if anyone else benefits from reading, then great :)
Life over the past couple months has been pretty amazing- lots of changes for sure. Let's see...some of the more monumental occurences have been:
Visiting Israel: For two weeks in November a group of friends and I from church traveled all around the nation of Israel- what an absolutely incredible experience it was. Here's a pic of me in front of Jerusalem.
Visiting Home for XMas: All of my family lives on the west coast while I live in the east coast; I only get to go home to see them once a year (at xmas) and two xmas' ago when I went home I had lost 70lbs and that was quite the shock for them- this year when I went home I wanted to have lost another 70lbs (which I did!) for a total of 140lbs lost and they were easily twice as shocked as last year. Truthfully, this was a really healing & redemptive time for me. Many of the people in my life today never knew me at 352lbs- sure they see that I'm continuing to lose weight but they don't know who I was back then and truthfully how I've been literally my entire life up until the past 2 years. My family has always been nothing but loving and supportive of me in every way- they never once said anything about my obesity (although perhaps they should have) but I always knew that silently, it worried them and they wanted better for me so it was just SO nice to be able to give that gift to my family members this season. I also felt like them seeing me healthy and happy was just one final way of really showing them that I'm an adult now & that I have my own life and that I'm doing okay. Although at first I could tell they weren't sure if I wanted them to make a fuss over it or not, eventually they learned that it didn't bother me and expressed how amazed and proud of me they were. It was definitely a healing trip. Below is a pic of me and 2 of my cousins on my last night there.
- Right now I really don't know what my final goal is but it's currently set at 180lbs so I have another 24lbs to go; however, I have a mini-goal before that of getting into the 100's by the end of February. I honestly cannot even fathom my weight having a number 1 in front of it...and the fact that I'm only 5lbs away from that is just insanely amazing. My goal is to be at 180lbs by the end of April- a lofty goal, I know, which is why I'm currently living at my best potential ever.
- Exercise: Right now I'm still exercising 5x's per week (but let's be honest, sometimes it's 4xs). I do a 60 minute spin class at least twice a week, 20 minute interval strength training circuit 3 times per week, and I run 3x's per week as I'm training for my first 5k later this year! What what! This is by no means the most hardcore exercise routine but it is the absolute most that I can do with working almost 2 full time jobs, having a boyfriend, and just living life; which means I've gotta be hardcore with my nutrition.
- Nutrition: I still am adhering to the principle that no food is completely off limits but I do live within a strict calorie budget of 1200-1300 calories per day. I still use the MyFitnessPal App to track my caloric intake (it's amazing). I still do all my food prep on Sundays for the week and while I don't eat completely clean or preservative free, I limit my calories and that's what works for me.
- This is a really unique season of this journey for me. I don't feel like I'm in 911 mode anymore where it's evident that my life is in danger because I could have a heart attack any second or get diabetes, like I said earlier- I really don't remember being this "small" so it's been hard for me not to become complacent with where I am. One of the huge things that is keeping me going and really not settling for less than my best is visualization. I frequently visualize both the things that I don't ever want to go back to (not being able to ride roller coasters or fit in certain seats) as well as the things that I still can't do but deserve to and want to (wear cute dresses, swimsuits, and sleeveless tops). I'm now at the point where every pound lost is uncharted territory and while it's a bit harder to believe that I can ever really be just normal, I am refusing to quit until I find out.
Peace out ya'll!